Fans welcome tired swimmers to the beach

When a guest shows up at your club meeting, how do you treat them? If your organization is like most, one or two of your members will make the cursory introduction while the majority doesn’t make an effort. In fact, most people will not acknowledge that there is a guest even there.

What kind of message does that send to your visitor? The answer to that question is obvious. It sends the wrong message. You are telling the guest that they don’t really matter.

The message that you want to send is, “Hey, we want you to be one of us!”

Here are 5 ways you can make a visitor feel like they belong:

1) Everyone, and I mean everyone, acts excited when a guest takes the risk of attending your meeting. You goal here is to make them feel the love. Done properly there should be no way for the visitor to remember the names of all the people they met. There should be, literally, a line of people waiting to meet the guest.

2) Announce their presence during the meeting. “Let’s welcome Bob to our meeting. Bob is a computer programmer on finance team. Bob, we thank you for taking time to attend our meeting.”

3) After the meeting ask the guest if they have any questions. If they do, answer them. If they don’t, make sure they know what the club is all about. Ask them why they attended and then describe how the club can help them.

Tell them about Web site or give them a flyer. At this point someone in the club should make sure they have the guest’s contact information. Make certain you include the mailing address.

4) Tell the guest how the club can benefit from having them as a member. This is perhaps the most important thing that you can do. People need to feel valued and this is a great way to do it. Do not skip this. Do not be vague about this. “Our club would really benefit from having you join. We currently have no members with your background and we could learn a lot from you.”

5) Follow up with a hand written thank you note. There is nothing, NOTHING, like receiving a hand written note. It just makes you feel great to get one. Here’s a huge secret: as good as it is to get one, it feels even better to write one. Make it a part of your organization’s processes.

If you don’t make an effort to let your guests know that you value them they will leave thinking that you don’t want them in your club. Don’t let that happen. You want them to feel like “one of us.”

A lot of people will pay lip-service to the development of employees, but when push comes to shove it often goes by the wayside. There are many reasons for this — strangled budgets or perceived lack of time. There are lots more, I am sure.

Just between you and me I don’t rely on my manager, and I have an outstanding manager, to plan my training or personal development. Heck, I have even taken a job just to learn a specific skill (i.e. course development and training). As Alan and I discussed this further I asked this question.

Why don’t we individual contributors have group meetings and don’t invite the managers?

Think about it. You can learn from and teach others in your group all sorts of things. When management is present at a meeting most of us peons are rather reserved. We tend not to be forthright and open. This is bad. Openness between the members of a group leads to trust and reliance. You know that others will help you when you need it. Keith Ferrazzi‘s book, “Who’s Got Your Back” doesn’t specifically address this concept but it is close enough. With a little work it can be applied to the Managerless Group Meeting.

I discussed this idea with one of my younger coworkers this morning. She liked it. She even mentioned that this would be a great environment for learning presentation skills. Hummmmmm… I think that I like where this is going.

Here is how you can get started.

Get the cards!
Chances are you don’t have Thank-you notes close by. If you do, find them. If you don’t, go get some. I like blank cards and cards with “Thank You” written on the outside. Whichever style you choose, make sure that they are made from excellent quality paper. They need to feel nice when you hold them. Stationery stores are excellent places to find just the right cards.

You can find custom made cards on the Web. I am quite fond Katie Blair and her note cards. She makes great cards. She made the cards in the photo.

Oh, make certain that you use a pen. This is a pencil free zone.

Write the note!

When do you send a Thank-you note? This one is easy. Send a card when someone gives you a gift or does something nice for you.

For example, send a card whenever someone:

• flies on your plane (Kelley, the AA flight attendant).
• agrees to speak with you on the phone
• forwards you information about a job lead
• interviews you for a job
• agrees to be a reference for you
• takes you to dinner
• gives you tickets for an event
• buys you a gift

It is best to send the note immediately. Don’t use tardiness as an excuse to not send a note. Send the note; late is better than never.

Be yourself. You should let the excitement show. It will make the recipient happy to know that they genuinely enjoyed the experience of the gift.

Describe the gift or experience in the note. Emily Post has examples of cards mentioning the amount of monetary gifts. It goes on to say that including a specific amount is optional. What isn’t optional is saying what you plan to use the money for.

If you receive tickets you should discuss how much you enjoyed the show. If you didn’t enjoy it you should act like you did. Be grateful that someone thought enough of you to give you a gift.

The most important thing: Just do it. Write the card and send it.

PS: You can follow the saga by subscribing to the blog. It’s free and easy. You can subscribe to both the blog posts (entries) and comments.

The neat thing about handwritten thank you notes is that there is no incorrect way to do them — that is, if you are sincerely thanking someone. We aren’t talking about suck up notes here. It really doesn’t matter what kind of paper or pen that you use. What matters is that you show appreciation for someone who has done something kind for you.

It is important for them to be handwritten because it sends the message that “thanking you is worth the extra effort it took to write and mail the card.” Handwritten notes garner attention because they have become unusual.

Here are some examples of when to write a thank you note:

• You give a presentation and someone gives you honest feedback. Send a card. Why? Because they took a risk and tried to help you. Most people take the easy way and and say “you did great” even when they don’t believe it.
• Someone mentioned your work in a positive way. You should be thanking them for that even if that someone was your manager. Let them know that you appreciate the feedback.
• The best thank you I ever received was from a guy that I used to help out with database issues. He would send an e-mail to my manager and a thank you note attached to a plate of cookies. When he needed help he went to the top of the list.
• If you run a club you should send a thank you note to any guest who attends. You will be surprised how much your membership will increase — very surprised!

I am sure that you can come up with myriad other examples. The point is, thank you notes are not just for high school graduations and weddings. Buy yourself a bunch of blank note cards and keep them handy (I like blanks ones because you can use them for many occasions). Whenever the opportunity presents itself write a note and make someone happy… You won’t regret it.

Here is a previous post I wrote on the topic of thank you notes: It Feels Good to Say “Thank You!”

I must admit, it made my day. I even saved the napkin. I have flown on at least three flights with Kelley and she has customized the napkins every single time. When I get on a flight and see her, I start to smile.

This is a treat that is easy to miss. My friend Alan, who I was flying with, turned down the drink and didn’t get a napkin. It is easy to miss small pleasures.

You may be asking “what does this have to do with me?”

You can provide this type of joy to the others in your life. Kelley makes me feel special when I fly. These days, that is saying a lot. No one at American Airlines forces her to do this. But she does. American Airlines probably doesn’t reward her for doing it. It should but she does it anyway.

When is the last time that you have written a note (make that handwritten) to someone? Your mom may have forced you to do it years ago, but have you done it recently? Besides … If feels good to say “Thank You!”

It’s easy to get started: buy some note cards and a pen (a fountain pen is nice) then send a note to someone. If you doubt your ability to write a great note then don’t worry. This is one case where it’s the thought that counts.

American Airlines — do something nice for Kelley!